Archive for December, 2005

Merry Christmas!

Thursday, December 22nd, 2005


See you next year!!!!!!

You think it was trying to tell me something?

Tuesday, December 6th, 2005

So, I’m at work and I want a snack. I grab a dollar bill out of my wallet and head for the vendy machine. After a millisecond scanning the selections, I decide I don’t WANT the fucking trail mix with the yogurt chips (ew) — I want a bag of DORITOS.

Yeeeaaaah.

Doritos.

Score.

I put the money in and carefully press A-2 and wait for my tasty chips to make their freefall into my lovin’ arms. Except, instead of releasing them, the machine just BEEPS at me.

“MAKE ANOTHER SELECTION,” it types at me.

But I don’t WANT another selection, I want my DORITOS!

I try again.

A-2

BEEEPBEEPBEEP.

“MAKE ANOTHER SELECTION.”

I don’t get it. I gave it the money. The Chips are THERE. GIVE THEM TO ME!

This is when I started yelling at the machine. Out Loud.

“I’ll eat what I WANT. Gimme my CHIPS, BITCH!”

BEEPBEEPBEEP.

“MAKE ANOTHER SELECTION.”

Wha the?

Guess who’s eating the goddamned trail mix?