IT

I am, by nature, NOT a gift knitter.

The deadlines don’t suit me, the STRESS doesn’t suit me, and the fact that I have to give the thing away in the end DEFINATELY doesn’t suit me.

Therefore, I swore I was not going to let IT happen.

Holiday Knitting.

No.

None for me.

Thank you.

Hell if I’m going to ditch all of *my* knits, bust my ass trying to make crazed deadlines, and stress myself out during my favorite time of year!!! I’ve seen what *it* does to people, and THIS YEAR, IT WASN’T HAPPENING TO ME.

No. holiday. knitting.

NONE.

NO.

sorrymaybenextyearNO.

bah humbug.

NO.

(get it?)

:)

Well, this Thanksgiving, wearing my pretty new long-sleeved minisweater, I curled up with my niece to watch the Charlie Brown Thanksgiving special (the one where Peppermint Patty invites herself over for Thanksgiving and Chuck makes her and the gang popcorn and toast and she gets mad and then they all go over the river and through the woods to Grandma’s condo?).

My niece is 2.

My niece is very cute.

Irresistably cute.

Like, take YOUR niece’s cuteness, and muliply it by like 10 and THAT’S HOW CUTE my niece is to *me*

(to you, she might just be darn fucking cute, but to ME, she is the be-all-and-end-all of CUTENESS)

see?


CUTE.

Right.

So, there we were, watching some Snoopy, when she started petting my sweater.

“Preeeeeeetttttty,” she said.

me: Yeah? You like it?

her: Yeah. Red.

me: You like red?

her: I want a sweater.

me: A red sweater?

her: No. Purple.

me: You want me to make you a purple sweater?

her: I ask Santa Claus.

fuuuuuuuck.

um.

You think three weeks is enough time?

20 Responses to “IT”

  1. Carol Says:

    She’s little. It’s enough time.

  2. Cara Says:

    Hahahahahaha! Those little girls will get you every time, no? They’re so freaking cute and girlie and you can’t so no EVER! Thank god we’re not their fathers and just their aunts – cause we can get away with a LOT of spoilin! She’s a babe – the sweater will take you no time!

  3. Carrie Says:

    You can totally do it. And she is totally a schmoo. The tiny schmoo in front is adorable as well.

  4. Norma Says:

    Yup, three weeks is totally enough time for a little one. Have fun! (and it WILL be fun)

  5. Rossana Says:

    I would say that year very cute niece has herself a “be-all-and-end-all” aunty! Yup, you can totally knit her a prezzie in three weeks! Get snappin’!

  6. Holly Says:

    OF COURSE you can knit a sweater for her by Christmas!! How could you resist?

  7. Angie Says:

    The Tigger sweater (http://knitty.com/ISSUEfall04/PATTtigger.html) knits up pretty quickly, and MC loves the fact that it’s so tickly. (I used that crappy fun fur shit instead of the ribbon yarn. It makes MC feel swanky.)

    Also, the Yarn Girls’ Guide to Kid Knits has patterns that feature bulkier yarns, so they knit up pretty quickly, too.

    You can totally do it. You’re a wizard with those sticks!

  8. Anne Marie Says:

    You are such a sap…which is what being a good auntie is all about. Maybe you could buy her a sweater and tear out the tag. Deceptive? Yes. Reasonable? Yes. Will she ever know? Maybe. But I’ll never tell.

  9. Christina Says:

    Well that’s it you have to do it now (or die trying at any rate). Don’t even pretend that you can resist a niece asking for a handknit sweater.

  10. Kate Says:

    Just think of all the great auntie points you’ll get for knitting it. I need a niece, all my nephew wants is guns and japanese toys. I knit him mittens and a hat once and I could see the dissapointment in his eyes. I’m jealous. Oh and Anne Marie’s idea isn’t so bad. I actually contemplated it for a sweater for my mom.

  11. Vicki Says:

    That’s what you get for swearing off holiday knitting. Haha. You’ll have plenty of time though. And seeing her happy will be worth it :)

  12. toni Says:

    Now who could say no to that? I agree that the holidays are stressful enough as it is so how about getting super chunky yarn to make the sweater zip along.

  13. Silvia Says:

    Oh she’s good! Think big yarn and little girl and it won’t take but a couple of days.

  14. carolyn Says:

    well you dug yourself into that hole. the moral of the story is: never wear anything you’ve made. :)

  15. Sarah Says:

    Although I admire Anne Marie’s sneakiness, I totally think you’ve got enough time. I mean, she’s tiny, right? Make her a mini-mini sweater! She’ll love it (and you) – maybe for 10 whole minutes! (She is 2, after all)

  16. Samantha Says:

    I think 3 weeks is totally enough time, she’s 2, it’ll be a small sweater. I’m sure you can do it, easy peasy!! She is extremely cute. I know what you mean about the be-all-and-end-all of cuteness. That’s how I feel about my 2 year old daughter … and well my 4 year old son too, for that matter. Kids are just plain ol’ cute!!!!

  17. Jason Says:

    Anne Marie, you’re my kind of auntie. That’d be rad if it was handed over with a rocks glass half empty of scotch in the other hand and a lit Camel swaggering from the corner of Lara’s mouth :)

    “Here’s yer sweatah kid, enjoy.”

    Lara, you have to knit that sweater… You can do it. Be sure to let us know how it turns out though.

  18. biglug Says:

    Four words – garter stich one piece.

    You can do it.

    :)

  19. Jenn Says:

    I think in three weeks a two-year-old will have absolutely no memory of any red sweaters petted or purple sweaters desired. If you really want to make a sweater for her, though, keep in mind that by xmas she may not even like purple, or it will be the wrong purple, or she may have no memory of the request but wear it daily until it hangs in tattered threads. I hope it’s the latter.

    In regards to the above suggestion about a one piece garter stitch sweater – “Haiku” on knitty.com was a piece of cake.

  20. Stacey Says:

    Ha ha ha! The Camel and scotch bit is hilarious! Otherwise, I saw go the Anne Marie route ;)

    Your niece *is* adorable….and I don’t hand out that compliment easily.